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Cats For Gold – Get Some Litter for Your Glitter!

Why be an eccentric millionaire when you could be an eccentric cat lady? (click image for more)

In case you’ve been living in a cardboard box for the past few weeks, you’ve probably heard of a hot new program called ‘Cats for Gold‘, which lets people trade in their worthless gold for cold hard cats. ‘Cats For Gold’ has been sweeping the nation and giving many people some much needed hope in these uncertain times.

Cat refining has been around for many years, but it has always been reserved for the wealthy, that is until recent breakthroughs in the cat refinery process have enable just about anybody who has been holding onto even the smallest amounts of spare gold to take advantage of this incredible opportunity.

Although the value of gold has been reported to be steadily skyrocketing for quite some time, people are reportedly becoming more and more weary of relying on financial news and statistics, mainly because of the failing economy and it’s unpredictable nature. As far as most are concerned, it is well know far and wide that cats have always been, and remain to be one of the most stable elements in our known universe.  Also, many people are generally cautious of anything that can’t pee all over their fine linens and leave loving scratch marks all over the leather couch.

catlady

Kara Phalin, a supporter of the Cats for Gold program

Delighted customer, Kara Phalin, states “well geez, I’ve got all dis gold stacking up all around me in da house and I don’t no what to do with it. You gotta think to yourself, what has gold ever done for me?? I mean geez, what if I were in a fight with some terrorists, aww geez?? Would the gold ever hiss and raise it’s tail at the terrorists to save our lives? I don’t think so. And geez, when’s the last time you ever sat down and had a piece of gold for dinner?? It’s totally worthless in my opinion. And there’s so many possibilities with a cat- cat soup, barbecued cat, broiled cat with peanut sauce, cat-kabobs,  cat creole, cat gumbo, deep fried cat, coconut cat, cat burger…”

The Cats for Gold program can be summed up in a simple 3 step proccess:

Step 1 – Send in your gold through the mail.
Step 2 – Get some cats through the mail.
Step 3 – Profit!

More information about the Cats for Gold program can be found at CatsForGold.com

About Paul

Hi, my name is Paul, and I work in a button factory. I've got a wife and two kids. Then one day my boss came to me and said "Are you busy Paul??" I said "NO." "So push this button with your left hand." So I did. And the process repeated itself over and over until all my body parts were pushing buttons. It was completely ridiculous...so I quit!

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